Monday, 28 May 2007

Nigerian scam fun

Into my inbox today:

Email as follows:

FROM THE DESK OF BARRISTER GREG MARTINS
114,GLOVER ROAD IKOYI
LAGOS-NIGERIA.
28TH OF MAY 2007

DEAR SONGER
I AM BARRISTER GREG MARTINS,AN ATTORNEY AT LAW. I AM THE PERSONAL TTORNEY TO EDWARD SONGER, A NATIONAL OF YOUR COUNTRY,WHO USED TO WORK ITH MOBIL DEVELOPMENT COMPANY IN NIGERIA. HEREIN AFTER SHALL BE EFERRED TO AS MY CLIENT. ON THE 21ST OF APRIL 2003, MY CLIENT IN OMPANY OF HIS WIFE AND THREE KIDS WERE INVOLVED IN A FATAL CAR CRASH N NIGERIA. ALL OCCUPANT OF THE VEHICLE UNFORTUNATELY LOST THEIR LIVES.
SINCE THEN I HAVE MADE SEVERAL ENQUIRES TO OUR EMBASSY TO LOCATE ANY OF MY CLIENT EXTENDED RELATIVES, THIS HAS PROVED RATHER UNSUCCESSFUL.

I HAVE THEREFORE WANT YOU TO ASSIST IN REPATRIATING THE MONEY AND PROPERTY LEFT BEHIND BY MY CLIENT BEFORE THEY GET CONFISTICATED OR DECLARED NSERVICEABLE BY THE BANK IN WHICH HIS FUND WERE DEPOSITED.SINCE YOU SHARE THE SAME LAST NAME.
PARTICULARLY,THE BANK WHERE THE DECEASED OPERATED AN ACCOUNT VALUED TO THE TUNE OF ($6 MILLION US DOLLARS) HAS ISSUED ME A NOTICE TO PROVIDE THE NEXT OF KIN OR HAVE THE ACCOUNT REVOKED WITHIN THE NEXT TEN OFFICIAL WORKING DAYS.

SINCE I HAVE BEEN UNSUCCESSFUL IN LOCATING THE RELATIVES FOR OVER 2 YEARS NOW I SOLICIT YOUR CONSENT TO PRESENT YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN OF THE DECEASED SINCE YOU BOTH SHARE THE SAME LAST NAME SO THAT THE PROCEEDS OF HIS ACCOUNT CAN BE PAID TO YOUR ACCOUNT AND THEN YOU AND I CAN SHARE THE MONEY TO A RATIO OF 6:4,MEANING I TAKE 60% AND YOU'LL GET 40%I HAVE ALL THE NECESSARY LEGAL DOCUMENT THAT CAN BE USED TO BACK UP ANY CLAIM WE MAY MAKE ALL I REQUIRE IS YOUR HONEST COOPERATION TO ENABLE US SEE THIS DEAL THROUGH.I GUARANTEE THAT THIS WILL BE EXECUTED UNDER A LEGITIMATE ARRANGEMENT THAT WILL PROTECT YOU FROM ANY BREACH OF THE LAW.

PLEASE IF YOU REALY WANT TO ASSIST ME TOWARDS THIS
TRANSACTION,KINDLY FORWARD THE FOLLOWINGS: YOUR FULL NAME, ADDRESS,AGE, OCCUPATION AND YOUR PHONE/FAX NUMBERS SO THAT I WILL USE IT TO APLY TO THE BANK ASAP

I LOOK FORWARD TO HEAR FROM YOU

BEST REGARDS
BARRISTER GREG MARTINS

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My Reply:

Dear Mr (or is it Dr) Martins,

I am overjoyed to receive your email as I am currently experiencing a dry spell in my Finances. Certainly a couple of mil will go well towards my new Lagonda, or possibly I will try a Bugatti this time.

I am so sorry to hear of the death of Edward, a most beloved relative of mine. (Did he leave his Dr Who videos to anyone, I have had my eye on them) and so sad to have missed his funeral.

I would be greatly pleased to assist you in your endeavour, then you could possibly invest some funds in a spell checker and get that shift key unstuck? You could also invest in a domain name for your company, it must be difficult working from a hotmail account.

My details are as Follows:

Sir Reginald Oscar Frederic Leofric Songer III
New Scotland Yard
London

Aged 78 (but young for it I am told (stamina of a donkey my mistress says!))
Occupation: Chief Inspector Serious Fraud Squad
Phone 999
Fax 999 (press send)

I hope to receive your reply shortly, Spiffing work old bean.

Kind Regards

Sir ROFL Songer III

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Hehe wonder if he will see through my cunning screen
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